Passion Struck with John R. Miles

Dr. Gordon Flett on the Urgent Need to Know You Matter

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

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10 min
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2:00
4:00
0:00 30:00 1:00:00
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In Episode 597 of Passion Struck, host John R. Miles sits down with Dr. Gordon Flett, a pioneering psychologist whose decades of research have shaped our understanding of mattering—the feeling of being seen, valued, and significant.

Dr. Flett, author of The Psychology of Mattering and Mattering as a Core Need in Children and Adolescents, explains how mattering is distinct from belonging and self-esteem and why its absence—what he calls "anti-mattering"—can lead to burnout, depression, loneliness, and even hopelessness.

In this profound and deeply personal episode, John and Dr. Flett discuss:

  • The difference between mattering, belonging, and self-esteem
  • Why feeling unseen or insignificant is a public health issue
  • How fear of not mattering drives perfectionism and overachievement
  • Why giving mattering to others is just as important as receiving it
  • Strategies to rebuild mattering after loss, failure, or transition

This conversation will change how you see yourself—and how you show up for the people around you.

Dr. Gordon Flett is one of the world's leading researchers on the psychology of mattering. A recently retired Distinguished Professor of Psychology at York University, he is the former Honorary President of the Canadian Psychological Association.

Connect with Dr. Gordon Flett: health.yorku.ca/health-profiles/?mid=...

For full show notes: passionstruck.com/gordon-flett-the-ur...

Next on Passion Struck:

In the next episode of Passion Struck, John sits down with Anne Marie Anderson, an Emmy Award-winning broadcaster, sports journalist, and leadership expert. Anne Marie has spent years breaking barriers in sports media, navigating high-stakes environments, and coaching top athletes and executives on leadership, resilience, and communication. In our conversation, we'll dive into the mental frameworks of high performers, the art of storytelling, and how to build confidence in any field.

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